John Stewart cracks me up

[Daiichidoku]

you spew it all over the place, difficult not to get it on oneself

didn't you ever learn NOT to try and cover it with your hands? only makes more and faster streams that way

[Reservoir_Dog]

sputum

I had to Google that one.

[Pudfark]

better to google it, than to swallow it....eh, Daii?